Yes sherle...

Today I Saw a Fox

2010-12-18T18:29:00.002-05:00

I saw it from by bedroom window. He wasn't really red, but sort of reddish... and bigger than the pair of foxes i saw in the backyard of my old house.

My camera, of course, was in another room!

Goody Goody - Benny Goodman 1980

2010-11-15T10:07:00.000-05:00

…a new look at blogging

2010-07-05T12:51:00.000-05:00

oh yeah. Now i’m blogging with Windows Live! That would be ‘cloud computing’ i think. Anyway, what the hey! Gonna give it a try!

It's been FIVE months...???? Really?

2010-06-28T15:23:00.003-05:00

What's new? Loads!!! Don't even know where to start... but currently wow! Today started with a bang of sorts.

Was chilling out after leisurely breakfast in my jammies when brother, Don, called. Mom was 'sort of' non-responsive and they had called 911. I've never jumped into my clothes so fast... was there in record time.

Saw emergency vehicle still there... slide show of August 29, 2005 flashed through my head... was in the house in record time too!

Sitting in the kitchen... Don, Maxine, and MOM! Three guys standing around getting their job completed (paper work, etc.) How do you spell relief???? Mom woke up this a.m. with blood sugar around 27(?)... her eyes glazey and not moving... sort of dazed! She refused going to hospital... had to sign a waiver saying so... What can you do? She's 94 and still capable of making her own decisions. Anyway, it's really tough on Don & Max.

My bid on the condo is in... should hear by Friday at latest. Need to sell my house. It's been listed since last Friday. Pray... pray..... pray! Stuff happens. Life is good.

...AND..... had a great scrapbooking getaway this weekend! Good fun; good people; and most of all... good accomplishments! 2005 - all done!

Move forward.

Today is Kakizome

2010-01-02T11:58:00.006-05:00

Kakizome means "first writing" of the year. This is my first writing and this is my traditional writing tool. Have long ago quit using the pen... so much so that it's hard for me to even try writing that way.

These five are only a few of the turkeys visiting my backyard last year... actually December 30 last year! There were more than a dozen in this flock.

Wild life love my place! In the past year this little acre has harbored birds small and large, groundhogs, chipmunks, a few deer (including a mom and fawn together), many skunks early in the year, bunny rabbits and even a few feral cats. Remember the kittens under the back deck?

Last year was a really positive transition for me... a year of learning and adjustment... and NO, i did NOT 'grow up' yet! I don't really want to and you can't make me!

The year 2009 included:

A new baby - great grandson Logan James, son of James & Amanda, grandson of Pam & Mike. He arrived June 16, 2009 and is perfect in every way.
I liberated myself a bit from the cable company by getting rid of my landline telephone. My home phone for over 50 years now goes wherever i go. I use MagicJack but only because it's really really cheap and i can use it for those hopelessly long waits with service calls.
More liberation when i purchased my own TiVo box at a really really good bargain, got rid of the cable company's box and receiving only Basic Plus television service which more than meets my needs. The TiVo works with my computers and wireless system, making it very flexible! I haven't even used all it's features yet because i don't really need them yet... maybe later.
Learned Charter now has a cheaper high speed internet service - hi-speed lite!!! It works for me!
Linda and i visited the girls in San Diego. Loved it! If i didn't like my current home so much i would choose San Diego as home.
Learned i don't need a human roommate... at least for now. Moving my sister in with me didn't work out. It seems we have very little in common. Before she moved out i was feeling used and abused (mentally, not physically... but it hurts just as much.)
Visits with my mom enhance life. About every two weeks we go grocery shopping and either lunch or dinner afterward. Her hair stylist for over 30 years is great! She now cuts my hair regularly.
Frank has become a beautiful idealized memory. He sometimes watches over me in my dreams... and awakening reminds me that i can remember those good times but must live now.
I joined an online People Meeting service... not once but twice (two different ones). What a farce! I'm convinced they have fulltime employees acting as shills to make us think they are for real.
My house continues to grow into my dream home. It is a warm, comfortable environment for me and my remaining feline roommates, EllieMae, AmyLouMae, and Miss Kitty.

Life is good. Life always moves forward. I will enjoy it to the fullest with family and friends and... if i really get lucky, maybe a special friend to share some of the travel and good times i am still young and vibrant enough to enjoy.

Today is COLD!!!

2009-12-16T16:51:00.002-05:00

...very cold. Brrrrrr!!! 18 degrees fahrenheit. It's not windy but the sun is not shining. Political idiots are meeting in Copenhagen discussing - guess what - global WARMING!!! Yeah right!

The woman heading up the meeting just quit today. The U.S. President Whatsizname, oh yeah Osama Obama something like that... is going there nearer to the end ot the thing. I guess so he can make a grand entrance and look down his big nose at everybody there while he apologizes for Americans (that would be us) just because we are Americans. That seems to be what he does best... when he's not sounding like he's still campaigning and blaming all the troubles of the world on the last administration.

I wrapped a few gifts... thought about what other few gifts i still want to buy. Maybe i'll do that tomorrow.

Meanwhile, my hands are cold as i use the keyboard on my laptop. Hmmm! there is some heat emanating from it.

I don't like winter. I don't like being by myself all the time. Maybe i should get a job???

Finally Got Out!!!

2009-12-14T19:10:00.003-05:00

Liberated! Yeay!!!

Emilio phoned me this morning and offered to come over and get me out. While we were talking i went out to check the weather. Stuff was melting at a pretty good rate. The snowdrift by my garage had melted down to maybe only a foot, more or less. I could see it was less steep next to the road where the snowplow had piled it up. I told him i was pretty sure i could get out and he wouldn't have to drive all the way over here to clear snow for me; i'd let him know if i needed help.

Then i noticed Jack had been over sometime between dark and dawn. My recycle bin was on the deck, filled once again with the plastics and glass that got dumped last week. He had brought the garbage can from my back yard where the wind had blown it.

Life was looking better again.

Once dressed to shop, i backed my car from the garage, turned around, and drove straight up to the center of the road... Success!!! Remembering what the husband used to do in similar circumstances. i just drove back and forth from the garage to the center of the road... flattening out all that wet sloppy white stuff! Then i went shopping.

Found THE tv stand i wanted for my second living room space... on sale! Not only that but i got another 15% discount using my credit card!!! Life is good! Bought gas... another pleasant surprise. It was cheaper when i came out of the store than it was when i went in... also using the same card i got 5 cents a gallon off!!! Then i remembered i didn't get a new plastic shovel for my decks... to replace the broken one.

Went to Menard's... mostly because i had a $10 credit coupon from last summer when i bought the lawnmower and i was hoping it was still good. Turns out it was! Bought the perfect 'deck shovel' for $5.95 and a giant container of disinfectant wipes for the kitchen.... and only had to spend a bit more than $2.00 and my coupon!!!

I felt so good about my day that i cleared th entire back deck with that new shovel!!! Yup! Life is good again!

This is a B****ing Session...

2009-12-13T12:52:00.003-05:00

I'm tired of being boxed in. My driveway is impassable. Today is warm enough that the snow is all soft and HEAVY... but not icy. I can't clean it off my decks because the plastic shovel is broken. NO Natalie, it's not your fault; it was already partly broken when you used it Friday. I suppose i could go into the garage & get the metal show shovel but that would scratch up and damage the decks.

There is still a big snowdrift about 6 feet from my garage door so if i tried to back out i'm sure i'd get stuck! The snow is heavy and i know no other woman my age who would even attempt shoveling snow. It's even too heavy to hire sombody to come and clean it up now. Maybe more will melt before the day is over.

I brought my newspaper in this morning; and the mail that has collected for a few days. Used my cane so i wouldn't fall and ruin my knees or break any bones or whatever, so of course there was a temporary traffic jam on an otherwise slow day for traffic.

I'm glad i had my Christmas spirit early because now it's all gone. At least i have decorations around the house so it LOOKS cheerful. When i went to the holiday bazaar at Leaman's i bought things for Dave, Linda, Emilio, and Mike. Oh i forgot... bought something for Patti too but she hates me so maybe i'll just keep that. When i shopped in Frankenmuth i bought something for Logan. Maybe i'm all done shopping. I'm not in the mood even if i could get out of the driveway!

I'm tired of living alone.

I'm tired of living out in the country where nobody lives. At least in the right city i could walk where i want to go. Of course i'd have to use my cane in this kind of weather. Incongruous, eh?

Maybe i just want to move to Arizona or maybe New Mexico... maybe one of the Carolinas??? Hmmm. I think i'll start looking. I shouldn't have any problem selling my house. It looks damn good!

I've Already Had Enough Snow!!!

2009-12-12T10:51:00.003-05:00

Remember this soft smooshy snow that was too HEAVY to move?

Well i'll tell you... the next day got really cold and it snowed some more! Any snow that i had pushed around turned into ice and today it is still impossible to move. I'm ready to move south for the winter... or maybe for the rest of my life!

I am totally snowed in until the snow melts.

Yesterday Natalie cleaned my house. It's beautiful. She got in just fine. When she tried to get OUT of my driveway, she had problems. Picture this: Natalie shoveling some of the piled up ice/snow, put in my driveway by the snowplow... then backing up and driving in fast forward..... while i, holding onto my cane for stability on the ice, am watching for traffic and telling her when to go... and go fast!

This lasted what seemed like forever. Then Jack stepped out of his garage door. His dog caught his attention to see what was happening outside. I wave at him and we continue our efforts. He apparently left his hearing aid inside when he came out. FINALLY... i tell Natalie it's a go (no traffic coming around the curve)... she gooses the gas and whoopeee.... she's out at last!

Lesson learned. So Jack tells me not to hire somebody to shovel my drive. He will do it for me... BUT he only does it when his driveway needs shoveling too. Fine... but. His wife is out shopping. I am grounded. No more listening to him! I'm hiring the job done.

Second Snowfall of 2009

2009-12-09T12:04:00.004-05:00

.....took place between last night and this morning.

I woke up after the snowplow and garbage collection this morning. Don't know if the white garbage bag was picked up or tossed into my neighbor's yard, but there sits the recycled stuff. Yup, recycled and mixed with the freshly plowed snow! Could have been worse. I noticed my neighbor's mailbox is down.

The snow is beautiful but i'm sure it will melt pretty fast; it's very wet and slushy.

Okay... i need to confess. This is a part of 'life without Frank' so i must share! I just paid for a 6 month membership in a 'people meet' online group. No, i'm not looking for love and all that stuff; just want to know somebody to spend an occasional evening or afternoon... for the companionship of it, that's ALL!

I promise myself i will not divulge any info that could endanger me in any way but an email relationship or two sure beats playing 'Farmville' by myself on Facebook! ...and it keeps me off the streets. (That's supposed to be a joke, kids.)

Love the Holidays?

2009-12-08T09:59:00.005-05:00

New shelves i installed over the tv in my cozy newest living room. NOW i really really need a new tv stand - corner style in the same walnut wood tones as the shelves, futon and fireplace in here! I think it will be my 'after Christmas' gift to me.

Yes, the family living great room is decorated too. Fact is i have four Christmas trees around the house... the ceramic shown here; two pre-lighted small trees, one in front of fireplace and one in the greatroom near the wood burner, and my five foot fiber-optic tree in front of the window in greatroom! This is the first year i've actually FELT that Christmas joy in my heart since my life changed drastically more than four years ago.

Pearl Harbor

2009-12-07T11:20:00.003-05:00

...was attacked 68 years ago today. I was five years old. I don't remember that day but i remember things that happened during those times. I remember almost nothing about my father - who was off again, on again with my mother until their divorce was final. I do remember though, asking him why he didn't have to go to the war. He told me it was because he was '4F' - and when i asked him what that meant he told me it was because he had flat feet!!!?

Now i know he was alcoholic. I also know he was eleven years older than my mother which means he was about 36 years old at the time.

I also remember when the war ended. I was nine years old at the time. We lived in a two apartment house in a primarily Italian-American neighborhood. My mom had banned my father from ever coming around to see us - their four kids. My new dad was not yet in the picture. He was in that war... a nephew to two of my mom's best friends in the neighborhood.

People were making noise with whatever means available... mostly tooting their car horns. Everybody was happy. It was a really good day!

Who do You Call...

2009-12-01T16:03:00.002-05:00

...when your sink has a leak? I call my neighborhood 'rent a husband.'

Thank you Jack...

Thank you Jacquie! These things would be a whole lot bigger if i didn't have you for a friend.

7 stories Barack Obama doesn't want told - John F. Harris - POLITICO.com

2009-11-30T16:51:00.001-05:00

7 stories Barack Obama doesn't want told - John F. Harris - POLITICO.com

Read this first thing this morning on Yahoo, of all places... usually mostly liberal in nature. Since then i've read it othre places on the net, including a newsletter i get every day. This article points out Obama shortcomings that some of us have been aware of for a long long time already!

NOW is a real time for a change!

...THAT long since i've been here?

2009-11-28T19:42:00.005-05:00

WOW! Well, the time was well spent. Among other events, i spent quality time with the newest family member... Logan. Here he is reading a book to his grampa Mike. Smart little tyke, eh? ...and SO perfect! Isn't he a beautiful baby? I can just hear his great-grampa Frank calling him a little round-head. Yeah, it is a term of endearment.

Hmmm... let's see. What else happened? Spent time with my mom - shopping, going out to lunch, getting our hair done... all quality time.

Went shopping with a couple of friends - Jacquie and Betty - to Frankenmuth. Can you believe... i've never shopped there before, even though we've eaten there many times over the years and visited during the ice festival in winter. Gotta go back to shop though; i really enjoyed that.

Oh! Had a cropping session here at my house with some of the girls one weekend. That was fun. Shar finished her SanDiego album... Natalie made a bunch of cards... and Linda mostly chilled out after having her eye surgery earlier that week. I determined how i will complete the album i was working on when i was still a married lady. Decided to make a transitional page and then add pages i create for my CM memory board as they change.

I was so glad to be with Linda when she had the vitrectomy... and i took her back the next day for the checkup. She is doing great... seeing a little better already and confident it will not get any worse now.

Also spent Thanksgiving with Linda... just the two of us. Everybody else had their own things going on and it was fine with me. We had a turkey roast with all the T-Day trimmings and watched a movie later. All in all, a fine day... made perfect by the fact that between Thanksgiving eve and yesterday i talked with each and all of my offspring! I love 'em all!

Today Nat, Emilio and i worked in my yard. They raked all the rest of the leaves and i cleaned up my garden a bit. We got the space under my deck cleaned up and ready for new things to happen in the springtime... yes, a very productive day!

I have my ceramic tree up in the cozy living room... and tomorrow will put up the fiber optic tree in the family living room... moving forward. All is well.

I think this is all good healthy growing. I will always miss my love but the pain is no longer the biggest part of my life. Thank you, God.

Did you Ever Wish you could Erase Everything and Start Over?

2009-11-13T10:06:00.002-05:00

I am not unhappy. I am not happy.

My life has been varied even though i was married forever. I've traveled... worked... played... loved and lived.

No matter what i did or accomplished... i always was proud of my biggest accomplishment. Together with my lifetime love (and sometime combatant) i raised six wonderful, beautiful, talented and intelligent daughters...

...or so i thought. I was recently called a 'failure.' This tells me i have lived 73+ years for nothing.

I whine when i have 'not enough' to do; i whine when i have 'too much' to do. I am no longer a wife. Now i am just a mother and a daughter... oh yeah... and a failure. I want to be ME! When will i have a chance to be me?

Who am I?

Kim's Pc to Tv

2009-11-11T17:55:00.002-05:00

Bridging the gap between PC and TV

Love is Unconditional...

2009-11-09T09:43:00.003-05:00

...but today i will carefully observe my horoscope:

November 09, 2009 Pisces
Avoid drama at all costs today -- there's no excuse for getting sucked into other people's soap operas! Things are happening all around you, and you might need to close your eyes to some extreme craziness!

Daily Extended for November 9, 2009 (Today)«
Pisces
Overview: The normal routine of your day will be disrupted early on by someone who needs your help with something entertaining. Turns out, they will end up giving you some help too, although you might not understand just how to ask them for it yet. In a business negotiation, your creativity will enable you to get what you want without sacrificing any of your hard-earned resources. If you make it clear that you are not willing to compromise, you must stand behind that statement.

------------------------------
Daily Overview for November 9, 2009
(Today) « Year of the Rat
1936 » This could be a rather unfortunate day for you. Be wary of being too calculating or secretive at work or people may turn against you. You may have trouble getting a loan today. Your family may be acting selfish and reckless, creating problems and stress for you. Try not to lose your temper or relationships could deteriorate.

Life is Good...
Ultimately we All die Alone.

About Yesterday...

2009-11-06T11:19:00.002-05:00

...well, yeah. Sounds good but it got windy. Windy plus low temperatures and less sunshine equals COLD! I don't like being cold. Don't have to be cold. Stayed inside where it's warm. Didn't do much of anything; did a little bit of lots of stuff. Mostly was lazy. That's okay, isn't it? I AM retired after all!

Today i put away Halloween stuff... but kept autumn stuff out and about. I love the oranges and browns and they look GOOD in my house. Too bad i don't have anybody who wants to come over to enjoy my company in my house. Hmmm! Is this another poorpitifulme day?

NO! i won't let that happen. I love me. I love me. I love me. ;-)

You know what i mean, don't you?

Sunshine! I love it...

2009-11-05T08:56:00.002-05:00

...and most of the rest of the leaves were all knocked down during the windy rainy previous days. Only those stubborn oaks hang on tightly. I just might be tempted to rake up the rest of those leaves... at least the ones accumulated in corners and up close to the house on the patio out back.

Emptied the garden 'pond' yesterday... easier than i expected. Glad it's done. The pond is a plastic container and i'm afraid a winter full of ice just might crack the bottom... and then, no pond.

I like having a water feature in my garden. The birds like it; and an occasional furry animal. It usually becomes refuge for an occasional frog as well... what with a 'creek' out back that has been mostly dry in recent summers.

Autumn... again..... and time to 'fall back' with our clocks.

2009-10-31T09:05:00.006-05:00

This fellow joined the family last year. Seems to be holding up pretty well considering his 'adoption fee' was only somewhere around $5!!! ...and he sits on the front porch - the windy side of the house.

I had to move him this morning though. Last night the wind came in from the west with a big PUSH and knocked him over on his bench, along with the two chairs that managed to stay put pretty much all year until now. I don't think you can see him from the road anymore but he should stay safely upright.

Life moves forward. As usual, life is full of contradictions. I spent a day with my mom this week while Nat & her hubby did yard work for me (her mom) at my house. It was the best day for yard work (no rain for a change) and mom had a doctor appointment as well as multiple errands...

More of those contradictions:

Social security payments will not increase because the cost of living this year did not increase...
But... my auto insurance premium increased, even though i'm at the top of their 'insurance rating' system and after comparison with other 'bargains' found my company is still the best bargain.
Pay on line didn't work because insurance company doesn't accept the one credit card company...
...and the other card company refused to pay that insurance company!???!
After 45 minutes of automatic phone instructions a girl in India told me she would instantly 'take the block off' that payment so i could pay online. (She said they sometimes block payment for no apparent reason?????) ...and tell me again why is Michigan unemployment above 10%?
I talked with agency in Michigan and they posted my payment... while i wrote a check and mailed it directly to them!
On a whim i checked 'current activity' on the 'good' credit card the insurance company doesn't accept and found a payment to a company i never heard of for $16.95! Girl i finally talked with sounded American... but not from Michigan..... and told me it's better to try directly with the disputed company first. Meanwhile she formally accepted the charge as disputed...
...while the girl at the company... (Indian? or British???)... would not tell me what the charge was for (to protect the customer's privacy)... only that it was for a 'membership' for which i would be charged monthly (!!!) ...and i thought I was the customer!???
She then told me she would immediately remove that and all future charges.
FYI: here is the disputed info - 10/25/09 PRO*VAC PASSPORT MONTH 877-349-4840 MN 100546863 1 $16.95 Services (Notice the State is a phone number?) I suggest you read your charges each month... how many times do these thieves get away with it?

We shall see. God bless America!!! We need all the help we can get!

The Week Began with Dear, Deer Visits

2009-10-22T08:55:00.004-05:00

Started the week Monday with a visit from Linda...
As we were preparing breakfast, a doe and two young deer appeared under the 'wild' apple tree in the flats of my backyard! By the time i got my camera, the young ones were off into the adjacent cornfield but momma deer was still enjoying her apple appetizer! Here she is:

She looks pretty healthy, doesn't she? She should be! We grow the best corn-fed deer in Michigan!

Yesterday, Wednesday, i attended a RedHat extravaganza with Jacquie and Donna and met a new friend, Betty. The event included lunch at the Horizons Center and entertainment by Three Men and a Tenor. Have you ever seen these guys? They are amazing! We laughed so hard we cried!

Somehow i still didn't get my 50 daffodil bulbs planted. Today is overcast and supposed to be rainy... and expected to continue through the weekend. Maybe i can get them in today??? ... the last 'warm' day for awhile, expected to be in the '50s... and colder tomorrow, etc.

Better get started, eh?

Thank YOU, Patti!

2009-10-12T10:00:00.005-05:00

Photo by Patti

(The guy behind me? My boyfriend!)

September 2009 - Dow Gardens

The kittens are really gone this time... at least from my house and my deck. Gotta thank Patti for that!

We walked with Leslie at her house yesterday... a great workout!!! It's so much more fun doing it with somebody, don'tcha know? Later that day i called her about something and we discussed the 'guilty thing' about just putting those kittens out to fend for theirselves. Even though they are extremely feral, they are so tiny and innocent - about 2 months old now.

She volunteered to come over and help me get the kittens permanently out of my life. Wow! Piece o' cake!!! That girl is good! With her majorly help we got them caged... and even got a bonus cat! (So be it; they've all been coming around for a free lunch!) The second kitten was preceded by the cat... not it's mother..... so what could we do?

Patti went home with two cages - two kittens and a sleek black & orange cat. Don't know if it was one of Florence's barn full of 'adoptees' or it really belonged to somebody. He's gone now... there really IS no such thing as a free lunch, kitty.

Patti's plan - take them to animal control in the morning... but she wanted to make them more comfortable in her garage for the night.

One kitten BIT her!!!

They are feral; could it be rabid? I'm praying not. Hopefully they are out of her garage now... and the responsibility of animal control.

Call me Patti.

Awareness

2009-10-11T09:48:00.004-05:00

Now that my oldest grandson is in Iraq i'm seeing more news about Iraq. This morning this one jumped out at me:

Iraqi police: Anbar bombings kill 14, wound dozens

Up until now i've been convincing myself that he is 'better off' in Iraq than he would be in Afghanistan. From now until he comes safely home, my life is a prayer for his well-being. I pray that the energy of his Grandpa Frank remain with him and help him make wise decisions.

When i was a freshman at Delta College, an English teacher brought up the question: What is your soul? I use the term 'energy' because i believe our souls are pure energy. Energy does not disappear. When your soul leaves your body, it remains in another form.

Go with God, James Franklin..... and do what Grandpa Frank would do!

The Wild Ones Are Outside......where they belong!

2009-10-10T09:14:00.004-05:00

The cold, windy autumn rain ended overnight - finally! The sun is shining. There is no wind.

This morning i fed my furry family/aka/'the girls,' turned on the weekend CBS morning show, and fixed my breakfast. I had a grilled cheese with Canadian bacon... a fancier word might be something like Canadian Swiss Panini. Made it with 35 calorie/slice Aunt Millie's Whole Wheat bread, so it was even good for me! Yummy! I will make it again... and again... and maybe for breakfast, lunch, or even supper!

I sat at my 'kitchen table' to have the sandwich and morning coffee. The wild kittens sat at my feet... waiting for theirs. They are so adorable you would expect to be able to cuddle them. You can NOT cuddle them any more than you could cuddle any other, larger, baby cat... or for that matter a baby skunk! I have the scars to prove it... and if there's enough room, they run off if you get too close! So.....

...when i finished my breakfast i got out the cat food. I went over to the door near the place where i had been feeding them - near the back door. I put food in 'their' dish, opened the door, and placed the dish about 18 inches away from the door - outside!

The bravest went first; the scaredy cat followed. When they saw me approach the door, they ran off! I closed the door. They came back to their breakfast. When it is gone i will not put out more food. They are outside where they belong. The girls and i are inside where we belong. The sun is shining. Life is good!

Addendum: I learned it is not my job to 'fix' everything that needs fixing. If they survive crossing the road, they will probably move into the neighbor's barn where she feeds so many cats she can't even count them. Of course we know they will continue to reproduce!

Brief Comments... okay?

2009-10-09T09:11:00.004-05:00

Wondering why i haven't been around here lately? For an ol' broad with 'nothing to do' i've been pretty busy, actually. Sometimes we make our own situations, don'tcha think? Like:

...the kittens under my deck. Was it 2 weeks ago already? I had help trying to catch the mom and remaining 2 babies. Result? Mom disappeared, never to return. Since then i've been feeding the little ones.
They would come when i called 'kitty kitty.' They took up residence on my deck. They would sleep in the kitty carrier i put out there for them. They acted like they wanted to come in the house.
Yesterday i invited them in and... they did! Long story short - they are wild! You have no idea what a really real feral cat is like. They sit and wait patiently to eat. They use the kitty litter. They hide where i cannot get at them when they feel under pressure. When captured in the entry room, one of them literally hit the ceiling in it's efforts to avoid me.
Today i will attempt to lure them outside. If successful i will not feed them or in any way try to rehabilitate them.
I promise!

Other than the kitten dilemma, life just happens... like:

...taking my wonderfully strong-minded mother out grocery shopping. What's that all about? ...coupons and sale items! Oh yeah... !!! Me? I'm swearing off coupons totally!!! ...unless they fall in my lap right when i need them.
Mom & i also go out to dinner... or sometimes lunch. I have to learn about NOT eating everything on my plate.
Some days WiiFit and i are friends; some days i walk with Leslie Sansone.
I bought a few new electronic items... learned that when i install them and read the book, i know how to use them!!! Believe me, this is a big accomplishment!

I quit bundling... think i mentioned that last time...

TiVo works like a charm!
Moved my 'big' tv into my newest cozy living space but two of the channels were not high quality like they were in the other living space. Cable guy replaced that cable. Now i have a beautiful picture on all channels... Basic Plus works great! Who needs more than 70 choices for tv viewing???
My only 'landline' is Magic Jack. Was having minor problems with it. Turns out the one phone just needs a new battery. The other - 3 phone wireless - seems to be working okay right now... again. Maybe with Charter phone gone, it will be better. After all, both services were voice over internet. That might have been part of my problem. We'll see...

Other updates...

Spring & summer are gone in my house. Autumn accents surround me beautifully.
Goober moved on... no more stinky male habit cleanups. This brought stability to the remaining 3 furry friends, all female, even with the temporary kitten situation.
If it ever quits raining before the snowy season begins, i will plant the bag of daffodil bulbs i bought a few weeks ago.
Attended a beautiful concert at a small church. Thank you, Jacquie for introducing me to the DeepRiver Choir!
Visited Dow Gardens again... this time with Patti! What a delight! We both enjoyed every minute.

And business-wise...

I formally protested to Medicare for not paying the bill from MMC for my knee exrays. Was told by a 'real person' that none of the denial was ever seen or touched by a human... except me of course. After they reviewed stuff from the hospital Medicare determined i do not have to pay the bill. The hospital is responsible. Get that!!! ...and do we really need more government health insurance plans?
Just received new car insurance bill. Insurance company has a new reason to charge more as your car gets older. Remember how i told you i've been buying a few new electronics? It seems the Home Owners Insurance Company got a report from a company called ChoicePoint Services, Inc. They have determined i opened too many revolving accounts in too short a time!!! I pay all these accounts when i'm supposed to and they will be paid off before the final dates when the accrued interest would take effect! This is NOT a credit rating! It's apparently just another way for insurance companies to make you pay more and get less! Can you believe this?
I will change my insurance company - for the house and my car - before this 'new' policy takes effect.

Don't Bundle Me...

2009-09-23T09:02:00.006-05:00

Funny how one thinks when young, in love, and married... emphasize married. I don't think it was just that though; it was also the era of 'The Brady Bunch' and 'Father Knows Best.'

In 1955, when Frank and i married, there were men's jobs and there were women's jobs.... well, sort of. There were exceptions like my mom, who chose not to remain in a bad marriage. She chose to work as a waitress and support her own kids in a 'women's job.' During WWII she joined Rosie the Riveter, working in an automobile plant, but quit when the men came home.

Anyway, when we married, Father Knows Best was still the ideal so it was easy to allow gender to define our roles. Besides... Frank didn't like changing diapers and i didn't want to carry out the garbage! It worked.

When the time came when it appeared my only language was baby-talk, Frank suggested i get out of the house. I did. Interacting with other adults, i discovered a whole new world of excitement. I was 'my own person' as they say. All this while, we still did many things within our classic male or female roles... keeping both of us relatively happy and relatively sane in a fast changing society.

He was the tech and all around fixer upper. I was the homemaker, cook and housekeeper.

He has been gone 4 years; tomorrow is our 54th wedding anniversary. I have learned much in the past 4+ years. That is a good thing.

This week i learned why men do a task and ask questions later... if they must!

Saturday last i purchased a TiVo and a new TV. I set up the TV - piece of cake! Sunday i tackled the TiVo. Piece of cake? Not so much!

Step 1 told me to activate my service, giving a choice of phone or online. I chose phone. WRONG CHOICE! The chick on end of line said i should talk with a technician if i'm setting up using a wireless adapter (because i no longer have a telephone landline.)

The tech gave me 45 minutes of convoluted directions, including 'take the box to a neighbor with a landline to get started...' I ignored him totally. Monday i bought a wireless adapter. I followed directions in the box.

Success with NO pain! How do those guys get their jobs, anyway?

Oh! The title? Don't Bundle Me???

I cancelled the Charter Communications DVR service AND phone service. I now have basic+ cable service and internet service. Don't let them kid you. I AM saving money by NOT bundling!

Woo-Hoo!!! I DID it!

2009-09-09T12:26:00.003-05:00

Oh yeah! I bought this little camera from Creative Labs... Vado is the brand. The cost somewhere around $130 included camera, case, two batteries, battery charger, cord and plugs for 3 different countries... yes, U.S. included. Also a connector for viewing on television sets.

Bought it on a whim and i LOVE it! We never owned a movie camera or camcorder. Couldn't afford such things, what with six daughters to feed, clothe and educate...

Bottomline: it's another sweet little toy to entertain the ol' brain cells. I uploaded it to YouTube and Facebook, as well as here! So easy, so fun. Now i need to practice taking better movies... practice editing them, etc.

Want a kitten? These three will be old enough by August 28 at the latest. (My veterinarian says 8 weeks is the right age for babies to leave their mommy.)

Meanwhile, don'tcha just LUV technology???

Sometimes Joy is as Simple as...

2009-08-26T09:35:00.003-05:00

...wearing an old pair of earrings. What? you may ask.

Sometime between retirement in 1986 and now, i stopped wearing earrings. It had become painful when i wanted to wear them, so i stopped entirely. The piercings closed up.

Occasionally i wanted to wear them, but couldn't. This spring, while visiting at Pam's home, i began thinking seriously about having my ears pierced again. Patti and Pam were willing to take me to Claire's at the mall, but i guess i wasn't quite ready.

Six plus weeks ago, Pam and i went shopping in Grand Rapids. First, i rediscovered the 'joy of shopping' and second, i had my ears pierced.

My first time Frank's mother pierced them with a sharp needle, some alcohol and an ice cube! This time was high tech! I enjoyed wearing the new pink earrings for six weeks but last night i pulled out my old ones... and decided to change.

Today i'm wearing some little gold starfish, a gift from Patti many years ago! I love them!

There's Luck..... and then There's Luck!

2009-08-25T21:51:00.004-05:00

Did i mention the kittens under my back deck? No, i guess that was on my Facebook. Until today there were (in my mind) a mother cat and her two kittens. Today i know better. She has three of them. One is white and two orange like their mom. Mom is little more than a kitten herself. Want one?... or two?..... or more?

I cannot keep them. I have four cats already, three of whom were adopted because they showed up at my door. AmyLou and her mom have been here 7 years now... Pam has the other two kittens from that family. Goober was adopted the year before that and had a 'squirting' problem recently, but i've been working with him and he doesn't do that anymore. Bringing in more cats would start him up again. I will not do that to him, no matter how cute are the kittens... and their little mommy.

Now... how's this for GOOD luck!?!!?

James is my friends' grandson. He stays with them in summertime. He wanted to see the goats and sheep one more time before going back home for the school year.

While pulling up clover and feeding it to the goats he said, 'Look! a 4-leaf clover!' and so it is!!! See? No he didn't feed it to the goats. I have close-ups of his 4-leaf clover but wanted to share a pic of the boy who found it.

I promised a Sheep Pic...

2009-08-22T11:14:00.006-05:00

and here it is:

Jaye Leaman, co-owner of Leaman Greenapple Barn, holds onto the next sheep ready to be sheared. Dave Owens, sheep shearer from Elwell, MI is ready to trade the first one he sheared for the next one.

What fun watching Jaye try to catch the little boogers! Her mom was video-taping the event and invited me over to watch... if i so desired.

I did.

Beanpole no more...

2009-08-21T12:42:00.002-05:00

...but rather a well-stuffed scarecrow!

I couldn't resist. When Sharba and i visited the Dow Gardens last Tuesday, i asked her to take my pic among the scarecrows. We were there for a photo shoot... a perfect pair! We ended up spending about 4 hours wandering about.

We originally planned to hunt for the sculptures that will be auctioned off - well - today actually! Got 'caught up' in exploring the Children's Garden, where we found the scarecrows among other things, in search for Snake Creek, which i was unaware of until this week's visit. That, too, was a fantastic photo-op.

Did i mention the Rose Garden? Oh yes! I never get enough of the Dow Gardens.

Wednesday, after we had lunch with Windy, Shar dropped me off and left for home. Jacquie called me with an invite to watch a sheep shearing event! Hey! It was SO cool. I have loads of pix and will share them in another post.

Later, loves...

I Think I Really Like my Wii Fit.....

2009-08-17T13:07:00.003-05:00

..but i'm not sure.

It keeps me moving - i like that.
I don't do anything that i know is unsafe for me to do... like standing on one leg, or sitting on the floor. Well, i really CAN sit on the floor; i just can't get up alone without standing on my knees (which the orthopedic surgeon said i should never do.)

The exercises are fun... i especially like the step routines, running in place and some of the balance routines. I love the Yoga but can only do some of them... because i don't want to ruin my new knees or fall on my rear! Strength routines are a great complement to the Yoga... yes i enjoy it and am pretty good at the ones my body and age allow me to do.

I don't like that i'm not losing weight - and some days it looks like i'm gaining! One day the little squeaky person tells me i'm overweight... and every once in awhile it says i'm obese! I don't believe the obese part. Yes, i'll admit i'm overweight... but to gain obesity overnight???

I don't understand why the Yoga and Strength routines tell me i have darned near perfect balance but the Balance routines call me a 'novice' or even less!!!

I'm finally getting the hang of some of the Aerobic routines, especially the more complicated version of the stepping - back & forth, sideways, etc. At first this was really difficult for me. Seemed like i could hardly ever change over to whatever the new step is in a timely fashion. Now i'm getting there.

Maybe some day i'll even be able to walk and chew gum at the same time!

Oh.. That photo in my last post...

2009-08-15T19:49:00.002-05:00

It's me... in SanDiego along the waterfront..... flirting with the mannequin! I've seen these guys on tv but never in person before. Had to interact with him!

Trying to Update Backwards...

2009-08-13T15:43:00.003-05:00

from 2005 when i first had to learn how to live alone. Tell you about it later. It's actually pretty easy!!! Right now i just want to share with you a pic i doctored up from the SanDiego '09 trip.

Now here's my word for today; it's a response i HAD to make after reading an article about WII Fit at SparkPeople:

Tomorrow is Day 14 for me and my little buddy... WII Fit!!! It has gotten me off my tubby rear & it makes me sweat too!!! I'm over 65 (hahahaha), have brand new knees (well, they're a few years old now) and doc will not allow me to do anything on my knees... BUT with some of the exercises i 'punt' and it's better than not at all.

I love the Yoga and Strength exercises but find that i can no longer stand on my toes... or on one leg without help... but i do the ones i'm able to do. I can feel the muscles. Am VERY GOOD at the half dozen in each of these 2 groups that i'm able to do.

The aerobics and the balance are both real challenges for me but i do them anyway. I'm not on the board all the time... you really can not run - even in place - on the board and are told not to.

i took a few days off from the thing and really missed it... just didn't make time for it. My muscles are finally beginning to stop complaining from all the twists, bends, lunges, toe-touching and assorted activities. I think the soreness is why i was not losing weight (actually gaining, according to the little WII kid)... and today actually saw a fractional downturn.

There are two things you can't take from me - my WII and my Paxil!

Dealing With Vendors & Manufacturers...

2009-07-02T13:52:00.004-05:00

...is never easy, but let me tell you: I am convinced that one gets LESS attention as a female, even lesser that that as a female over age 65!!!

i own a Hewlett Packard laptop computer with 17" screen; paid $999 for it in August 2007. Bought a few other items, including an extended warranty on the laptop. The vendor was Best Buy. You've heard of that company before, haven't you? Same with Hewlett Packard.

These are both respectable companies, right? HAH!!!

Today i still do not have a reliable laptop computer! It is sitting in somebody's workshop somewhere (maybe in the United States, but with all the outsourcing going on, who knows?) That piece of garbage has literally been in the shop more than in my house since i bought it.

From day one i've had problems with it. Mostly it would lock up and i couldn't get anywhere with it. Had to push the button to turn it off.

Here's the litany of problems:

Two 'fried' hard drives were replaced.
Frequent lock-ups when i had several applications open at the same time. When i took it to BestBuy they told me there was nothing wrong with it & sent me home with my problems.
Vibrations & loud noises led me to believe i had a fan problem. Took it in & they replaced the fan.
Two weeks ago it would not recognize my wireless connection. i knew it was the laptop because two other computers in the house had no problems whatsoever getting online through my wireless connection. After a couple of rebooting experiences, i could not even turn the thing ON!!!
Lemon policy does not apply because my second problem was not, in Best Buy's opinion, a problem.

Yesterday i wasted a good share of my day trying to reason with the unreasonable. Talked with BestBuy customer relations (hahahaha) for a half hour to learn number 5 above.

Then i talked with a HewlettPackard representative who informed me that they would have replaced it for me if i'd complained to them during the first year... since that's how long the company warranty applies. Again hahahahaha! i don't believe him.

Then he told me there have been a small number of that model computers with the same problems. For that reason they have a 'special warranty' lasting until the end of July 2009. He will send me a pre-addressed box & if i can get the computer back from BB & send it to HP, they will replace my computer with a new motherboard... which he said is the problem.

Get it back from HP? hahahahahahahaha! Impossible!!! It's 'in the shop' & i can't have it back until it's fixed.

What did i learn?

Do NOT buy Hewlett Packard products.
Do NOT shop at BestBuy.
The 'Geek Squad' doesn't even know the difference between a product number and a model number!

Today i phoned a local hospital laboratory where i had my last mammogram. I am personally responsible for a couple hundred dollars out of MY pocket because Medicare will not pay for it. Even though i know it's a matter of negligence on the part of somebody in an office... incorrectly inputting a meaningful code, it is MY responsibility to negotiate directly with Medicare! I choose to wait until after the Independence Day holiday to argue with them!

I didn't even choose Medicare as my primary insurer. It automatically became my primary insurer when i turned age 65. Thanks to federal government. hahahahahahahaha....... Hey you guys with the white coats.... come & get me! I'm ready!!!!

Today is Father's Day 2009

2009-06-21T13:15:00.002-05:00

i've had the pleasure of loving three fathers...

My genetic father lived with us - off and on - for the first 10-12 years of my life. i remember lots of bad stuff, all relayed to me by my mother. i remember a few good things, from my very own memory. i remember sitting on his lap... he called me 'daddy's little girl'. i remember not seeing him after he and mom divorced. i remember mom didn't want him to come around or see his children. There were four of us. i remember he phoned me when i graduated high school. He wanted to see me. i said no. i visited him once after that, when his sister, my Aunt Fleda told me he was sick. i went to his funeral. My brother and two sisters went with me when they heard about it.
My dad was my step-father. He did not adopt us and i always called him Tony. Now that he is dead my sibs all call him 'dad' but i don't know if they did when he was alive. i remember Tony as a good father who made sure i behaved myself. i think he loved me. i remember after Tony had several strokes my mom complained about his bad habits. Did she not understand why he had those bad habits? i remember he died in a nursing home. We all went to his funeral.
My husband was the father of my six children. i loved him then. i love him now even though he is no longer with us in this life.
Oh! i forgot! There are four more fathers that have been in my life for many years now. These are the fathers of my six grandchildren. Yeah... i love them too.
...and now there is a special new father in my life. He is the father of my first great-grandchild, Logan James, who was just born last week! I love him too.

Last night i dreamed about my genetic father. You don't need to know the details. It was not a bad dream. It reminded me that i really had a 'real' father.

God bless all the fathers in my life. I love you one and all!

...on today's work ethic

2009-05-30T12:02:00.002-05:00

I was in line to return reading glasses that fell apart during the second use. They were really cool glasses - very tiny and folded down for storage in a cylindrical holder with a pocket clip. This looked like the perfect solution to perpetually losing my glasses.

There were three customers on my side of the service counter... all waiting patiently. Two female associates (that's what they call clerks these days... perhaps to make them feel more important?) kept themselves busy behind the counter.

One of the associates was walking back and forth, wrestling with a big box. This store offers postal service for customers. The other one varied her time between talking to one of the waiting customers and talking on the phone... looking like a multi-tasker at her best. Her customer was also standing in the 'special services' area - part of the counter where you can mail things, buy lottery tickets, cash checks, and heaven only knows what else!

During this time there was a male associate entering and exiting a door which looks like it goes back where 'all the important people' work. He would look at the cash register and go back through the door. Meanwhile the third customer at the counter was standing near the cash register area, only on the customer's side. The guy never looked at her, or anybody for that matter, before going back through the door. Golly! He looked busy!

This scene lasted a few minutes while i'm standing next in line, waiting to be called to the counter. A line is forming behind me. Time for action.

The next time the busy male associate walked out to the register, I asked the customer across from him if she had been waited on. She said no. The fellow getting postal service commented to me that they were 'all' busy... one girl taking care of his package... the other on the phone.....

Meanwhile the 'busy' male associate handled the waiting customer's business, called me over, rang up my return information and called the next customer.

As i walked away, finally satisfied, the one gal was still struggling with the big box. Her customer was telling her how to measure it... and the other 'busy' female was still talking alternately on the phone and to the other customer.

Today is Memorial Day...

2009-05-25T14:32:00.006-05:00

...and today i am sick... but here's me last week, along with a few of my best friends! Look at those smiles! We're having lunch at a place called Prado in San Diego. What are we smiling at? The cute waiter, of course! How else did you think i could get a pic of all four of us together, eh?

Tomorrow is Easter Sunday...

2009-04-11T22:31:00.002-05:00

..today i did laundry... needed certain items so it couldn't wait until next week.

I baked a cake for tomorrow... will be having some of the girls and their families over for dinner.

When i brought in the newspaper, the whole neighborhood was so quiet, there was not even the ordinary noise of traffic. For a moment i actually felt lonely... then my neighbor called to wish me a Happy Easter; we talked a bit; i was not lonely.

... and today i saw excerpts from three different sports - baseball, basketball, and even a football game! You know, i think i liked sports better when each one had it's own season.

Life without Frank is a learning process...

2009-03-01T12:44:00.003-05:00

...bigger than i ever dreamed. Between June 2008 and today i learned that i cannot 'fix' everything, no matter how much i want to.

In June my sister (one of three) moved in with me. She had a series of 'bad luck' with her living arrangements, money, and all that..... all of this after a lifetime of bad choices with men including two 'bad' marriages.

All i had was a big house, a big yard, more space than one person needs, a need for somebody to help me with the chores inside and out..... and a love for my maternal family that had been in the background during my life of adventure with Frank.

I soon learned my sister is not the little sister i remember. Matter of fact our lifestyles had changed so drastically in opposite directions that we have nothing in common. I also learned she had no intention to help with anything around the house, inside or out.

She lived in her bedroom when she was not at work. We had dinner together, and even that was not overly pleasant. She did not enjoy the foods i learned to like during the last dozen or so years of learning a healthy lifestyle with Frank, a lifestyle that prolonged his life (although not long enough!) She only went outdoors to have a smoke.

Today my sister arrived around 10:30 a.m. with a U-Haul truck, two of her grandkids and her car. By 12:10 she had all of her earthly possessions loaded, including Zeke, her Himalayan cat. She came back into the house, handed me my keys, and started counting out her money... her last 'rent' payment for living here. I told her i didn't want any money....

...and she said, 'It works for me.'

Goodbye little sister. I wish you only good things. I love you and I am trying not to cry. I wish i could say i will miss you, but i will not miss your abusive language... i will not miss the nasty sour ash tray smell whenever i walk past the room you occupied..... and i will not miss the occasional, but too frequent cat feces and urine on the floors of my home.

Wonderful Weekend...

2009-02-25T12:00:00.002-05:00

Yes, this IS Wednesday but still wanted to say how much i enjoyed my weekend past. #5 and i are kindred souls in the winter driving department and she & i did a great job of getting us from here to there (across the state.) The drive, which is normally 2 to 2-1/2 hour drive took us more than 3-1/2 hours in nasty wintery snowy weather.

15 minutes into our trip we met up with the beginnings of a snow storm. As we progressed westerly, so did the storm. Amazingly, in the big city, people seem to think they can drive 80 mph regardless of the weather... on the expressway!!! We dodged many of these brain-dead types... and then... as we got into the city, their multiple several-car pileups!!! But we made it... slow and steady, 45 miles an hour most of the time.

We were determined to be there for a baby shower - a very special one. My oldest grandchild will be a father in June. He is in the U.S. Army. His wife will be moving to his base the first of March... so we needed to have a shower for her.

It was a small elite group. It was fun... well worth the determination and trauma of getting there. My first great grandson received loads of good stuff... mostly necessary and some just for fun. His mommy is SO happy... and so is his daddy! God bless little Logan James.

Thank you Number 5, for braving the weather with me. You are amazing!

Answered prayers.

2009-02-15T00:16:00.003-05:00

Yesterday my friend had cancer removed from her colon. She has been tired lately. Lab results showed she had low blood count. Just last week she had a colonoscopy and learned there was a small mass in her colon and by end of this week it is gone!

Her husband said she has only 4 small holes in her tummy. Isn't modern medicine wonderful?

New Beginnings...

2009-02-14T22:32:00.003-05:00

For a while i was blogging in my first one... since then (August 2009) i discovered we can import & export Blogger stuff from one to another, so if you notice some lack of continuity... or repetition...... that is why. This is actually a combination of 3 blogs. One was totally separate. Following is the transition from Grumbleeze to After Frank.

...are necessary sometimes. This blog, Grumbleeze, was all about me, sherle, a married lady. Then the husband died. Life changed more than i ever would have believed.

Before, we were us... we were we..... we were frank'nsherle...... we were a team. We were joined at the hip!

I was the old-fashioned girl... went from my mother's house to make a home with my husband. Now, for the past three plus years i have been me... i have been
discovering me..... i am learning to be me, all by myself, for the first time ever!

It is time for a new blog...
Come, visit me here at my new blog: Yes Sherle, there is life after Frank!

a quote...

2009-02-11T19:54:00.000-05:00

"What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity. These are but trifles, to be sure; but, scattered along life's pathway, the good they do is inconceivable."-- Joseph Addison

Like my picture?

2009-02-09T22:49:00.002-05:00

You can make one too! i did this at obamicon.me. Saw it on one of the tv news shows last week.

There are two options... the other is red white & blue... like the Obama posters seen on tv. This one is an adaptation and i personally like it better than the other.

Happy Valentine's Day!

2009-02-03T15:18:00.003-05:00

Yesterday evening... tough! She blew up at me after i told her why i closed her bedroom door, keeping her kitty out of it! Daughter 1 & i walked in the kitchen door and were overcome by a sickening 'sweetish' odor of decay and cigarettes. Her poor kitty had pooped on the floor in her bedroom because... ta dah!!! ...she closed the litter box up in the closet before leaving for work!

When i told her to clean it up... and mop the floor.... get rid of her cigarette butts and don't store them in the house... she blew up at me! It was, get this, MY fault because my cats PLAY in her litter box and she's tired of cleaning up after them!!!

i asked when she is moving... she said, '...not soon enough' but only told me ...'three weeks...' when she heard me talking on the phone, repeating when Daughter #6 asked me when. D6 and i talked until i calmed down and all went well from there.

She is all packed up. I am not encouraging her with kindness. I'm convinced she has become so pitiful after a lifetime of 'hard living.' I can't fix it. She says about 3 more weeks before the place she will move in to is renovated. (She has 2 sons who work for a landlord, remodeling between tenant changes.) We are BOTH counting the days... although not together. Talk about the Elephant in the Living Room!!!

This morning she went out to smoke and stood blowing the smoke at my kitchen window...!!!???!!

It's a Birthday...

2009-01-30T11:39:00.003-05:00

Does anybody remember besides me? i love you Frank. i always will, but i realize the physical door between us is closed.

i'm opening new doors... and i even opened one that lasted 7 months and it is presently in process of being closed! i know you would approve of closing this one!!!

i've opened several other doors though. These are real keepers and i know you would encourage me in them.

Quote of the day today is:
'The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.'
- Flora Whittemore, author

Life IS good...

2009-01-28T20:04:00.003-05:00

...even though sometimes situations are not so good. i grew up trying to find a pony in the room full of horse manure! It's usually there... you just have to know it... and look for it! As a kid, there was a lot of manure and it was a small room.

i finally got out of that room when i met and married Mr. Right. During the ensuing fifty years, he pampered me with encouragement and praise. In his wisdom he provided me with self confidence and a strong feeling of personal worth.

Then he went and died on me... suddenly and with little warning. During his memorial service, his best friend said... '..Frank's job was to make Shirley look good.'

i've been looking for that pony again. i just think i found it and another pile of manure emerges. i refuse to quit looking. i KNOW there's a pony in here somewhere!

Customize Your Settings

2009-01-27T12:56:00.001-05:00

Customize Your Settings
Note: i unlinked this because it was only to see how it works.

okay, this is something on my new traveler! Yeah i know, it's on my bigger 'puters too but i never tried it before.

This is just the cutest little thing AND weighs almost nothing! i can wrap it up and carry it around in a big purse if i want to! LOVE it!

Second Thoughts...

2009-01-27T10:45:00.001-05:00

...maybe i should let her stay with me. Maybe i am a sinner for not understanding her illness. Maybe... maybe...... maybe........

This morning i was awakened, once again, by the continual coughing, choking, gagging, spitting almost to the point of throwing up, and more coughing and choking. The disease is called COPD; spelled out it is called chronic obstructive pulmonary disease.

The tv ads for Spiriva should show what i hear every morning. ...and it's not just mornings; it's just worse in the morning, after a night's sleep when her poor abused body has done it's best to try to heal itself. It appears to be a losing battle because, after the morning pulmonary exercise trying to excrete those poisons from her body; after she medicates; she goes outside for a breath of 'fresh' air... and that precious first cigarette of the day.

When mom was in the hospital for so long this summer, Sis kept saying we need to be by her side because... 'nobody should be left alone to die.' Was she really talking about herself?

i did some online literature search this morning. i will spare the details and especially the photo included with the first article. i learned how insidious this COPD really is!!!

Here are the best of what i read: http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/health/dci/Diseases/Copd/Copd_WhatIs.html

http://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/art.asp?articlekey=86131

...and here is a quote from an article pushing their own non-prescription product. It describes some of the research being done.

Literally poking holes in patients' lungs
Shooting special "glue" into their
lungs, and
Putting one-way valves inside bronchial tubes to let stale air out

Good heavens! Now i know why, even when she's not smoking, she smells like an ashtray! Pray for my sister; pray for me.

Am i selfish for needing to move her from my house?

peanut butter...

2009-01-26T17:56:00.002-05:00

..who'da thunk it could make you sick? By now we've all heard about the dreaded salmonella 'epidemic' related to peanut products. Finally, there is a list of products & companies where the peanut products are all safe!!! Find that list on SparkPeople. Here's the link: http://www.dailyspark.com/blog.asp?post=find_out_which_peanut_products_are_safe_to_eat

i Had a Dream Last Night...

2009-01-26T10:29:00.003-05:00

..... Sis stopped by my 'place of employment' - a very conservative, quiet place. (...??? i've been retired for 23 years, but yes it was a business atmosphere.) She wore a dress (???!!!) and had her hair in a bun!!!!! (Her hair is extremely short) Everybody was fawning over her... 'so glad to see you...' etc. and totally ignoring poor, hard-working me! Duh! Wonder what that could mean?

the woman has two faces (at least) - her 'public' face and her 'private, at ease' face.
she does nothing to help around here, but likes to accept praises for how 'good' it is for me to have her here.
she gets along with her peers at work.
yesterday after i had my dinner, she took a phone call and continued gabbing while cooking her dinner, during her meal (at the table, talking loudly and cheerfully), after her dinner while she donned her coat & went outdoors for the after dinner smoke, and into the other living room where she was watching tv before and after dinner.
i have never heard her so cheerful and talkative!!!! Not EVER!!!
they were talking about *work and the people there and cutting them all down.

Now i know why we have nothing in common.

Update: Yesterday she asked me how soon she has to move... that her son is remodeling a place right now for his employer (who rents houses & apartments) and it should be ready in about a month. i told her a month is fine. i suppose she hopes i'll change my mind again.....

I Will NOT change my mind. See the motto top right column? It is my motivational mantra. i will put it on all my active blogs until she actually moves out! Motto is no longer there, but here it is for posterity:

Reminder to Self
*i am beautiful! *i am talented! *i am intelligent! *i am wise! i am versatile! i am flexible! i am NOT a doormat!!!*It took almost 50
years of marriage to a good man to begin believing these things. i will NOT go back to dumb, ugly, and useless!

I no longer care. My other motto - 'you gets what you gives.'

*i guess you need something to hang on to when your own job is sorting giant bins of discards. It's a big decision-making job. She has to decide what to throw away and hang the 'good' and the clean stuff for resale in the store part of her place of employment.

Good NEWS!!!

2009-01-24T13:05:00.000-05:00

My new 'baby' was shipped out today! Hoooooooooray!

Yesterday... not bad

2009-01-24T11:34:00.001-05:00

Sis went to work, came home, talked to her cat (who was out among 'the living' all day), and went to her room. Not sure what's going on but i presume she is continuing to get ready for departure. i will NOT allow myself to feel like the bad guy here. i'm not sure there even IS a bad guy in this fiasco!

i went downstairs to see if anything is changing there. She has stuff down there just sitting around, already dusty and getting dustier, on a flat surface. Until yesterday, for the past several months, there was also trash... lots of trash... just sitting near the door looking ugly. (Perhaps she was waiting for me to take it out?) Yesterday there was a shiny new box of heavy duty trash bags and two all tied up. Not sure if she knows what day is 'garbage day' even though she actually took some to the road last Tuesday... remember?

i went into the 'rummage sale room' and noticed she has removed her stuff from that room. God forbid i should get rich on her junk! Noticed i had rummage stuff in boxes with her name on them - from her move here. I transferred stuff to 'new' boxes that i obtained recently... and put her boxes near her stuff. i suppose that's another 'hint' in her mind???

Today she is gone... perhaps at work? i don't know but departure time was right for it. i will not bend; i will not give in. i am strong, remember? i am NOT a doormat!

Did i mention that the windy weather blew kitchen door open last night? It's not the first time since she moved in that has happened. i closed it and locked it and she probably thinks i locked the door as a 'hint' too???? See what i mean?

i DID it... i DID it!!! ooooo!oooooo!OOOOOOO!!! happy dance!

2009-01-23T13:55:00.005-05:00

...i just today purchased a really really inexpensive very cute little laptop!!! Well, i ordered it so i don't have it yet... but will probably have it before my HP laptop is back from the shop!

Yeah yeah yeah...... i did it because i want to. Been thinking about another 'puter since the 'old' HP first went to the shop! The 'old' one is almost 2 years old but started going batty shortly after the first year was up. Glad i bought extended warranty with this one cuz it turned out to be 'lemon of the year.' Had 2 notices to fix it myself... from email so far, and first time i took it in after notice... it had not 1 but TWO burned out harddrives!!! 2nd time it was 'locking up' but BestBuy couldn't duplicate the problem in store, so i got it back - AFTER it sat in the store for 2 weeks or more... NOW it's making a very loud noise!!! Geek squad is very kind... but said it has to go in. Said it takes HP techs to determine lemon status, so who knows???

Meanwhile, ol' sherl sits at home with the trusty old HP desk version, but it is so-o-o-o-o-o slow! Ordered the new laptop from Comp USA... it just might be my new favorite store!

My 'old' laptop is pretty much top of the line for that year, 17" screen, etc.; the new one is smaller but 'big' in features! Delivery was cheap and should arrive 3-7 days from now. Will probably have it to play with before my HP comes home.

The brand? Acer
... and the OS is..... Windows XP!!!!
Oh yeah, baby!

Ima Happy Camper

2009-01-23T12:14:00.001-05:00

Update: It's working!!! Sis will move out. She is pulling together her stuff even as i speak... well, not right now, she's at work, but you know.....

Here are some facts:
i love her.
i cannot live with her.
we have not been able to communicate since the early years of her first marriage.
i am not accustomed to a screaming attmosphere so last time Sis screamed at me, using words i don't even like to READ, let alone say or hear, i phoned a daughter and let her hear it.

i needed confirmation that i am doing the right thing by getting Sis out of my life.
i hope this is not forever, but if it is, it's her loss.
i tried.... and tried... and tried.....
...... and will not try again.

Somthing to ponder this morning...

2009-01-21T08:28:00.004-05:00

"Interestingly, koi, when put in a fish bowl, will only grow up to three inches. When this same fish is placed in a large tank, it will grow to about nine inches long. In a pond koi can reach lengths of eighteen inches. Amazingly, when placed in a lake, koi can grow to three feet long. The metaphor is obvious. You are limited by how you see the world."
-- Vince Poscente

A friend, a new friend, recently told me i really should get myself a passport. i think i will!

Get This!!!???!!!

2009-01-20T16:18:00.001-05:00

Today Sis had a day off. i don't ask questions. She doesn't talk unless i speak first & so i try not to speak. YOU know how hard that is for me!!! lol

She took cat for grooming this am...
This afternoon i asked her if she was going to be home for dinner. She said it depends... she had a 4:00 appointment!

i was gathering trash to get it out to curb for early morning pickup... and the phone rang. i told D#1 i needed a break; it's garbage day; blahblahblah.... and whoosh! Sis was gone!!! Out the door!!!

Neighbor brought paper a short time later... Guess what! He went to Sis' place of employment today and they were CLOSED!!! That's why she didn't go to work. Wow! She sure filled her time in fast eh?

Okay... new plan..... D#1 is willing to organize the family get-together for a mass removal of this unhelpful, disgruntled, no longer welcome... relative! i just want it to be pleasant weather cuz i don't want her adult kids tracking in and out of my house with all that snow!

Inauguration Day

2009-01-20T11:16:00.002-05:00

Today i am watching the inauguration of Barack Obama. i do not want to miss any of it!!! My generation lived with the Martin Luther King's dream. We saw discrimination in mid-Michigan and read about much worse discrimination in the south. I, along with the rest of my generation, prayed for this day. Even though i did not vote for Obama, he makes me proud to be an American! God bless the new First Family and God bless America!!!

another horoscope... no wonder i'm confused!

2009-01-19T11:52:00.001-05:00

Quickie
You have solid footing in your life now — and a good sense of where you want to go.

Overview
Decisions are harder than ever right now — how can you say ‘no’ to anyone or anything? You do need to shut at least one door and soon, but you should feel totally right about it before you do so.

See, it just sounds like me! I just keep seeing this domestic problem i’m having and wondering if it’s as bad as i think, or just a bit of imagination creating a drama where none need be. I will dwell on it more before making any decisions. I think what i really need is a plan… but first, i have an appointment today.

my horoscope fits ME:

2009-01-18T10:08:00.001-05:00

Quickie
If you defer to what other people want, you could appear to be a doormat. Get tough!

Overview
Someone has unreasonable expectations of you -- but you might be too keyed up and full of good energy to refuse! It's a delicate balance, but eventually you do need to tell them 'no.'

=========================================
i am NOT a doormat!!!

i DO have good energy!!!

My good energy refuses to accept any more sh__ from self-serving people!

Not late, early!

2009-01-17T22:19:00.001-05:00

I smelled cigarette smoke in the house. The only rule i ever gave her was 'no smoking in the house.' Smelled like coming from downstairs so i said, 'smells like somebody's smoking down there.' and went back & sat down in the living room. Heard her voice from bedroom, laugh & say to somebody (on phone i presume) 'i was in the laundry room.' LIE!

Fresh smoke smells different than the usual stale smell she carries.

Cooked myself a burger around 6:30 & finished off the leftover pasta i made yesterday. i'm really sick & tired of having another body in the house. It's like having a big beligerent child living here, except she does clean her own room & rinses off her dishes for the dishwasher.

As far as other chores, during the six months she's been here, she swept snow off part of the back deck once. She helped me take garbage to the road once (a once/week job.) She brought newspaper in once or maybe twice (?) but always reads it and reminds me she wants me to save the Sunday crossword puzzle for her!!! She cleaned the bathroom once. Hmmm - anything else? Nope!

Now how does this benefit me? I will tell her she must move out when the weather allows. I just can't make her do it sooner..... can i?

My kids are glad i have somebody living with me...

2009-01-17T12:17:00.001-05:00

Hahahahahaha!!!! and now...more about the on the onagain/offagain phenomenon. Yesterday sis left her cat in her bedroom with the door closed... so i left him in there all day. I never know if she did it because he hasn't used his personal litter box yet, or if she just wants him in there...???

In keeping with my new policy to 'not speak unless spoken to' (just with her!), when she got home from work she went in room, opened door & let poor kitty out. He headed for the kitchen & 'regular' catfood & 'regular' water!!! He just LOVES the 'public trough.' His food is more expensive & she gives him bottled water. No wonder she has no money!

Neighbor wanted me to ask her about an item they might have in the store where she works, so i asked her. I was cooking dinner at the time. She answered civilly as though we just always have on-going conversations. We had dinner; we had conversation; then she spent evening in her bedroom (except for occasional trips outdoors for a cigarette.) It was one of those incidents that make me feel, 'oh what the heck! Might as well let her stay here.'

I finally had a good night's sleep last night (another story) so was up before she went to work. She was on phone... i heard her say something about '...see you later' and when she looked at me, i said 'morning' and she responded. Otherwise it would have been a 'silent' encounter.

Poor kitty is shut up in bedroom again today. Will she be home at dinnertime? Will she be late? Who's cooking dinner today? Who knows? This is my life.

on again..... off again..... what to do?

2009-01-16T09:15:00.001-05:00

Today's Pisces horoscope says it all...

A friend is having a hard time managing their partnership with you. Be patient.
Let go of anything old that's been holding you back -- you've got a free pass to get on with your life! It's a really good time for you to meet new people and try new projects of all kinds.

Sounds like my life! Hmmm. Also sounds contradictory. Or is this multiple choice? I choose the second part!

The friend is my live-in sister (my fault, i asked her to move in.) i've BEEN patient. She is the 'something old' as well. i'm not letting this relationship - i mean, non-relationship - hold me back. i will not be obsessed by the situtation.

Life is an evolving process. Life is good.

Okay... i'll admit it.....

2009-01-15T10:24:00.003-05:00

i think i'm ~~OCD~~ oops! i meant ADHD. i think it's a good thing as long as you use it for good. i think i do. Yes, i just started yet another blog. Wasn't gonna do it but when PowWeb (sponsor of my domain) offered WordPress as part of my new package, complete with an easy install, the geekiest part of me just could NOT resist!!!

Okay, i wasn't gonna share with ANYBODY, but here it is:
sherle's blog It's green & clean... simple and i'm gonna keep it that way... no whining, no long reminiscing, just honest to God simple journal style on how i spent my day. i already broke my promise to myself for daily updates, but i have a good excuse!

...and what IS 'organic food' anyway?

2008-12-17T22:47:00.001-05:00

This question was in my SparkPeople email today... suggesting ideas for blogging about healthy lifestyle.

Do you think organic foods are healthier?

Good question. If you're talking about vegetables, the most important thing to make these foods healthier is washing them well before eating. i believe organically grown means no use of pesticides. Pesticides do not enter the vegetable; they kill insects that invade it while it is growing. i would much rather have an apple that i have to wash than bite into a nice juicy.... WORM!!!

Now if you're talking about meat, i believe the best beef, chicken, or other meats are healthier to eat if they haven't been fed artificial chemicals like growth hormones and chemicals that are supposed to enhance the animal in any artificial way. Some of the best steaks i've ever tasted came from corn fed venison! Yum....

i could go on and on with this subject but sometimes shorter is better, don't you think?

Good Day...

2008-12-16T23:12:00.001-05:00

Some days are better than others. This was a good one. i slept too long... awakened around 9:30 am. The house is comfortably clean. Extra Christmas decorations and emptied decoration boxes are put away. i set up the outdoor decorations that were knocked down by the horrendous winds we had Sunday. i know what needs to be purchased to finish Christmas shopping. i bought a few groceries today and got a rain check on a little tv i want to buy for the bonus room. We had a good dinner and enjoyed watching some favorite shows on tv tonight. My home is warm and cozy.

Life is good.

Yesterday..... Sunday

2008-12-15T10:50:00.001-05:00

Busy busy day for this ol' broad! Weather warmed up to the 40's so all that snow on the decks loosened up enough to be pushed away. It wasn't windy so felt pretty comfortable with a coat on.

i cleared a section on the back deck... took about 20 minutes..... then took a break. Remembered to 'cool down' those upper muscles (the ones i used in pushing all that heavy wet snow). Repeated this method until most of the deck and all the stairs were cleaned off! The stairs are no longer lethal... not until the next freezing rain or snowfall anyway.

The cool downs really paid off because today i'm feeling pretty darned good! Also, shoveling wet heavy snow qualifies for some good, productive aerobic exercise and strength building, and 20 minute sessions are something i can handle.

Did a bit more holiday decorating and helped sister move her big chair into the 'bonus room' so she can enjoy her Christmas tree. That is the new room off from our bedrooms (created during my little renovation completion project two years ago). i've been encouraging her to use the bonus room as her living room ever since she moved in with me in July.

i'm more comfortable in my old 'lived in' living room and this gives each of us our own space. You would think i'd know my own sister but we've both learned a lot about each other in the past five months. i'm thinking our mom's 'too long' stay in hospital and rehab facility was instrumental in the learning process.

Sometimes our bad times together overpowered the adjustment period because we had the added conflict of getting to know each other again... adjusting to two women in one house..... AND having a 93 year old mother fighting a physical crisis.

First of all mom won! She is back home with our brother and his wife. All three of my sisters helped mom until she could do more things for herself, thus relieving our sister-in-law, who is (in my humble opinion) a saint for having mom there. Sis#2 spent two weeks living with them... having weekends off when the other two sisters relieved her. This week is the beginning of life back to 'normal' - whatever that is.

Today i want to finish holiday decorating... just touches here and there..... and put away the containers. Planned to go shopping but the wind is horrendous and weather cooling fast. I'm staying in the house. There's a whole week left to finish my shopping and i'm sure the sales will continue and if anything, get even better.

Beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

2008-12-13T23:14:00.001-05:00

Today i put up my tree... and my sis put hers up too! It's looking mighty pretty around here. Already had a few new decorations outdoors on front porch. Life is good and getting better. Will arrange a few more decorations tomorrow and that's enough.

Dear daughter cleaned (my monthly cleaning) and it sure feels good around here. She also brought up the boxes of decorations because i'm still having some pain and planned on doing less decorating because of it.

Food Review - and More...

2008-12-12T10:46:00.001-05:00

My winter cereal of choice is traditionally... hot oatmeal, usually of the instant variety. This week i decided to venture toward something new and bought Kashi GoLean Instant Hot Cereal. I love Kashi cold cereals! This hot stuff? Not so much.

The cold stuff is crunchy and crisp; the hot stuff is chewy... Hoping one of my SP daughters likes it because i really don't like to toss perfectly 'good' food in the trash.

On a totally 'nuther tangent, yesterday afternoon, my right knee suddenly began to pain me. It hurt when i put weight on it and also felt a bit numb... or stiff..... or both. (Actually it was the muscle surrounding it; my knees are totally manmade.) I called my insurance company's nurses, a free service for when you mostly want advice. Their phone was unavailable... call later. So i phoned my orthopedic surgeon's nurse.

She suggested ibuprofen, a heat pad and staying off my feet for the weekend. She suggested the pain was a result of my shopping expedition the day before. Funny thing... today it doesn't really hurt at all. Hmmmm...

A bit of history, almost 2 weeks ago while attending a baby shower in a local restaurant, as i attempted to be seated the chair literally slid away behind me and i landed with a thump on the floor in front of my sisters, assorted nieces and their friends and even dear old mom. After the obligatory, 'i'm okay...' and my jokes about 'all that padding; how can it hurt too much?' the party continued.

My lower back still hurts today. i've probably been compensating for this pain when i walk. A bit of rest and TLC seems to be helping the knee (muscles). i guess i'll live.

BigSis (that would be me) is 'the strong one.' BigSis is 'unbreakable.' The myth continues.

Winter Whites

2008-12-11T23:11:00.001-05:00

Picnic anyone? This is the way my back deck looked a couple of days ago when i took this pic. It still looks that way today.

Michigan... gotta love it... either that or be a bit crazy, eh?

Will i prevent weight gain during the holidays this year?

2008-12-10T13:40:00.001-05:00

Well, i did last year... and was SO proud. This summer i was still down to a respectable level and holding. Out of a sense of optimism (insert: eagerness, love, desire to 'do good', loneliness, or perhaps just plain stupidity), i encouraged my sister to move in with me.

She has changed... loads more than me, i think (although i probably have a bias). She is no longer the fun-loving, eager woman i knew years ago. Life did something to her i can't 'fix' - but i still love her. She has a chronic lung disease, or bronchial, i'm not quite sure, but won't quit smoking. Even though she doesn't smoke in my house, she steps out the back door to smoke... the odor is on her clothes so you can smell it in the house anyway. She 'tried' to quit since moving here but started when our mom went to the hospital.

She has diabetes but will not eat healthy food. No matter what i buy or cook, she lets me know she is not very fond of it. She prefers the fatty starchy version. She IS a good cook, but doesn't like whole grains or most vegetables... unless the veggies have a buttery sauce on them.

Since she moved in, i've tolerated a variety of mood swings to which i am not accustomed. My usual good humor is taken as 'sarcasm' even though my friends and rest of the family seem to enjoy my company. My desire to have her 'talk things out' or for any real conversation is considered tiresome and greeted with grunts or one syllable answers.

Okay, so the question was... How will i avoid weight gain during the holidays.

This holiday i will remember my SP friend's favorite quote: "You are always a valuable, worthwhile human being -- not because anybody says so, not because you're successful, not because you make a lot of money -- but because you decide to believe it and for no other reason." Wayne Dyer

i will eat like i did when i was working to keep my husband alive. i will eat healthy foods regardless of what my new housemate likes to eat. i will eat moderate portions.

i'm beautiful, dammit!!! i will remind myself of this every day.

i will continue to love my sister but remember to love me first. After all, how can you have any love to share if you don't love yourself. Meanwhile, her disposition really is improving. This i know.

strange feeling...

2008-12-09T11:42:00.001-05:00

...when you wake up in the morning, begin it like always. Turn on the TV, turn on the computer, make your morning two cups of coffee...... whoops! No TV!!! Charter Cable has a blue screen... 'You are not subscribed to this channel... blahblahblah..... if you are subscribed check your cable to see if it's unplugged......'

Hmmm! Computer is online (that's good.) Mmmmm! Coffee's done (that's good.) Uh-oh! the town siren is blowing... and blowing..... and more....... for at least 5 minutes; maybe longer. Was there a prison escape? ...a fire? .....an accident? Who knows? THERE IS NO TV!!! I hear NO fire engine or other types of sirens..... just that continual siren sound. Nobody knows what it means... Can't reach neighbor's phone (she has Charter phone & when TV is off, so is the phone! she has a new cell phone so i don't know the number yet.) Well anyway, the doors are locked.

Phoned my trusty son-in-law. He drove my daughter to work; says it's freezing rain... don't take any unnecessary chances. Thank you, SIL!!! The siren is probably something to do with an accident somewhere nearby, or a cable down somewhere..... or???

Oh yeah... i remember! i DO have a radio. Turn it on... news? It's not the same. i NEED my Fox News fix!!! TV still doesn't work. Will i be okay? Will let you know.....

Thank God the internet is working!!!

Tradition... what it is?

2008-12-07T19:37:00.001-05:00

When we were kids, days moved so slowly... and now..... well, it's Sunday again. Since my life changed i've had a new tradition. Every Sunday a few friends & i get together for some fast food and ice cream... always ice cream for dessert.

It's fun. My friends are so wise. They knew it was time for a new tradition - for them and for me. We all look forward to this time together. We thank God for the friendship and the food. We eat the food. We enjoy the friendship. We look forward to next Sunday. I love these wonderful people. I enjoy the food and the laughs..... but dear God, why do the Sundays seem to come faster now than they did when i was a kid?

It's Saturday...

2008-12-06T21:56:00.001-05:00

.....and it snowed all day. Had a phone call from an acquaintance involved in an earlier part of my life. He facilitates a writer's group i expressed an interest in... and now i will be a part of that group. Growth is life. Life is good.

An OLLI new day...

2008-12-05T15:04:00.001-05:00

Woo Hoo!!! I just finally joined OLLI (Osher Lifelong Learning Institute)! Been planning to do this like... forever..... and finally went to a meeting with a friend last month. Saw several people i know; met some new people... even a neighbor who lives just down the road from me. Talk about a new day.

First on my OLLI agenda, planning to join the photography group and the writer's group. FUN!!! Yes, i'm a happy camper.

It's a New Day!!!

2008-12-05T11:03:00.001-05:00

Hello... this is the NEW me..... the BORN AGAIN me!!! Been there; done that... loved and shared and lost and grieved. I will never forget but now i'm ready for that shiny brand new day! Wish me luck.

2008-08-29T10:01:00.005-05:00

Anniversary...

That day... that moment... when your soul left your body, I knew...

We will no longer walk together along the beach...

and enjoy the sounds of nature around us

enjoying that contented peaceful togetherness.

Many souls joined you that day...

As Hurricane Katrina blew in,my best friend drifted free.
Shall I scream? ...or cry? ...perhaps wring my hands in despair?...

or wallow in the muddy substance of self-pity, mourning my loss?

No! I will celebrate the release of that beautiful soul.....

from your prison of muscle, skin and bone......

to the freedom of God's universe!

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

2008-02-14T12:10:00.004-05:00

You need to visit this beautiful song by Elton John...
Can't you feel the Love Tonight?

Thank you Sherry...

For some reason i couldn't put the actual video here... but it's easy enough to find, right?

Miss Kitty and i want to wish you the very best....

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

never too old to learn, eh?

2008-02-13T23:57:00.003-05:00

Didn't know there was a song about 'me' until my friend Lori from SparkPeople told me about Shirley by Shakin' Stevens. Well, if you want to hear it, click on the arrow in center... just like on YouTube, where we found it! Visit Lori's website, Melodie and Harmonee.

Then i visited another SP friend's website and she had a YouTube song on her page... so i viewed the source and saw what size she made it to fit on her blog... SixtyFiveAlive.

While you're browsing, click on my SP recipe thingy at the top & find some of my personal favorite healthy recipes!

hahahahahaha!!!

2008-02-10T11:38:00.000-05:00

Look what i found!!! i have a friend from SparkPeople to thank for this one! Her name is Lori... from Michigan..... and she does karaoke for fun, being a computer jock by profession! Thank you Lori. This ol' amateur is having fun with this one!

Gonna do it...

2007-09-25T10:15:00.000-05:00

Here you go girls! The pic of my pontoon boat - unfortunately for sale... cuz i don't really use it anyway! Guess a half hour drive is still too far to bother with. Silly (lazy?) me!!!

Notice the SparkPeople thingy above? Since actually working at a lifestyle change with SP as a guide, i've actually lost 17 pounds!!! That's without trying very hard. When i actually get going with the exercise portion it might even go faster.

...and SP is not just another 'flash in the pan' according to Business Week! For the second year in a row, SparkPeople is on their list of Best of the Web. Also, read what SP has to say about it here.

power of one - a new release

2007-09-20T16:34:00.000-05:00

: "1. Power Of One - Bomshel "

I'm using Rhapsody on my new laptop with Vista. Just trying to learn to use the 'puter & i signed up to use this program - available to sign up for. Kinda neat! I don't know if you have to sign up & sign in to listen to this song because i'm still signed in.... anyway free music can't be all bad now, can it? Yes, there are two paid options plus i can buy this one for 99cents if i want to. Well, gotta go... will check in later when i have more time

I'll tell you what it is! It's a...

2007-09-04T13:38:00.000-05:00

circular staircase -

looking from top straight down at it. Recently had the steps covered with the charcoal carpet & used gold colored strips because with the oak trim it looks better than the silver color alternative.

...and here i wanted to share my old laptop computer's current desktop. Yes, the photo is beautiful as well... took it at the State Park in Holland, MI during my last visit with #3 daughter. I LOVE the ethereal quality of the unbrellas against the warm summer sky... but that's not the reason i'm sharing.

Notice the clock & the weather stamp? I got them from Yahoo Widgets. Also have the widget toolbar but prefer letting it hide when i don't need it. The other widget i downloaded & have ready access to is the gas saver widget. It gives me a list of current gas prices in my area, so naturally i only use that one when my car is low on gas. The best part of these things - you can make them partially transparent (as mine are) or not at all... or keep them hidden until you want to see them. Check 'em out!

I learned about these little gems from the computer club where i still maintain membership. Gotta stay up to date, right?

Gotta share this with you...

2007-09-02T22:15:00.000-05:00

I took this photo recently & just wanted to share it. Can you tell me what it is? Of course, I know what it is... i took the picture! I want you to guess. I'll be back to give you the answer later.

Today is an anniversary...

2007-08-29T09:11:00.000-05:00

...one i do NOT enjoy but must observe.

Two years ago today my husband was working on a household project downstairs in the family room. He came upstairs, telling me he needed my help - then sat on the floor. He was pale & cold & clammy & i phoned 911 as i ministered to his request for a drink of water. 1st response arrived within 5 minutes & ambulance in ~20 minutes. By then he was gone. For the first time in my life i was completely alone.

Was gonna say i'm sorry for sharing my grief, but i'm not... I need to do this. I loved him always & we were best friends. We had many of the same interests. We did everything together. Until August 29, 2005 we remained as one entity... & now it was broken. He truly LIVED until he died. For this i am grateful.

We spoke occasionally about what one would do without the other. I am there. I heed his words. I make the best of this 'half life' after living so fully for 49 years, 11 months & 5 days of marriage. He is always with me so i do not dwell on his physical absence. Life goes on.

new life...

2007-08-06T22:03:00.000-05:00

A week ago, the last Sunday in July, my sister Gerry & I visited our sister Barb. Barb has the most beautiful garden i've ever seen in real life... even though i have a friend who is a master gardener & her garden is beautiful!

Yes, i took lots of pics but I call this one 'Barb's Garden.'

Last Saturday, on the birthday of my twin girls, i took my mother for a walk in the Dow Gardens. She had a pretty good workout for a 91 year young woman! We had a great time. Yesterday, the first Sunday of August, Gerry & i took mom out to dinner at our favorite Chinese buffet. I went off my diet & ate just about everything on the buffet that was fried! Mom did a pretty good job of keeping up with me!!!

I thought they were dogs at first...

2007-07-16T22:34:00.000-05:00

...then of course i knew! They are the foxes my neighbors have been watching from afar! They invited me over to watch them one evening... and they appeared 'way over near the river and we could barely see them!!! But this!!! This was great! They were in my backyard - a total of three..... and i was able to get 4 shots all together. The camera was set on macro & i had to use my telephoto so they're a bit grainy... but there they are! Aren't they beautiful?

Good news!

2007-06-25T22:01:00.000-05:00

Saturday my sister & I went to my lake property to clean up & get it ready to put on the market. We were not even unpacked & inside when a neighbor came over in his boat to say hello. While we were talking another couple pulled over in their kayaks.

Before we had the rest of our stuff out of the car, I had shown the couple around the premises... and they were already sure they wanted to buy the property. I gave them an 'as is' price & Sunday morning at 10:00, they were over to discuss a bit more, wrote a 'good faith' check & my sister & I went home without having to do all that work.

Today came a phone call. Their loan is approved. The place is sold & it wasn't even 'on the market' yet!!! Needless to say, I'm elated! Sometimes things were just meant to be.

New, new, new!

2007-06-21T10:19:00.000-05:00

Last month i decided to move on to a new blog... and a new outlook on life! Last week i visited an old friend on the net - nowhere near as old as i, but that's another story. She had moved on too!

This blog is a new beginning - a new slate. If you do not see your blog on my list it's because i haven't been there lately...

Now... back to the kitchen. I forgot to have breakfast so i think it's brunch time!

Day 3...

2007-06-17T11:57:00.000-05:00

...not really but got a thing going here! Had two graduation parties, a daughter visiting from California, and a 'moving away' potluck in the past few weeks and somehow managed to lose 8 pounds anyway. Now that's not bad at all, is it? I'm giving Sparkpeople.com loads of credit for this, coupled with the fact that 3 daughters & my grandson's fiance are members as well. Mostly two of the girls & i are currently very active there & that continual support, coupled with the free Sparkpeople tools, is a very very good thing. Check it out. You might like it!

I signed up for a daily motivational email that encourages the blogging portion of the program. This includes a quote & i'd like to share the quote from this morning here with you.

'There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as if everything is.'
Albert Einstein, physicist

My house has a deck that spans the entire back on the second level. The first level is a 'basement' - partially exposed with windows & doors from the ground up. It is a beautiful deck.
From the deck you can see my back yard. Beyond that is a field, farmed annually by a local farmer. Beyond that is a row of trees & the river. Although i can't see it i know the river is there. Somebody recently commented as he stood on my deck - 'This is a million dollar view.'
Funny, i never really looked at it that way. I've lived here all of my adult life & i guess i just took it for granted.

Recently i've learned to enjoy & appreciate this 'million dollar' view. I've had breakfast on the deck - in the morning before excessive heat takes over the day. I've sat for a while & listened to the sounds. Yes, there is traffic driving past my house but mostly they are hardly noticeable. Across the river is a state highway, but as it goes through town traffic must slow down.

What i hear is the birds... so many birds. They love the trees my husband & i planted throughout the past 47 years. We wanted to create a wild life haven. We did.
There are bunnies & chipmunks. An occasional frog from the nearby county ditch (we refer to as the creek) visits the little pond my husband created in the garden the year before he died. I see an occasional little garden snake... helping keep the grasses insect free. They rush away when i'm around, sometimes startling me as much as i startled them.

The yard is green even in the driest of seasons because it is more than grass... it is a neatly mowed meadow. When I mow there is a smell of clover & mint... and in the closer yard - the smell of lemon balm gone wild.

Yes, i am learning to enjoy, to appreciate this miracle... the beautiful natural habitat that grew with our love... right here in my own back yard. In this day of weed killers, insecticides & the chemically perfect yard, my backyard is truly a miracle.

granni is gone...

2007-06-15T09:57:00.001-05:00

salli is here.

My horoscope for today:

Quickie:Your creativity will allow you to have fun and get out of an
unpleasant assignment.

Overview:If you were in charge of everything, traffic would be clear, you'd never spill coffee on your good wool pants and that annoying clerk at the local cafe would ... Oh, let's face it, it would be too much work. Let it go.

Day 2...

2007-06-15T09:53:00.000-05:00

My boat goes in the water today. I'm doing this alone. It seems that now my husband is dead, my kids do not like boating any more. I have no friends who really like boating. The boat was mine before he died almost two years ago; the boat is still mine. I like boating. I moved it from the lake 'way up north & 2-1/2 hours away so i can use my boat more often. Now it is on the river, only a half hour away!

A real woman doesn't need a man to use her boat. A real woman can do it alone. I will.

Day 1...

2007-05-25T16:13:00.000-05:00

..is actually Day 8 because that's when I started using the WeightWatchers point system. Seems to work pretty well most of the time & sort of keeps me in line when out and about. The most difficult part is starting out with existing recipes - counting points on some of my favorites. As this blog develops I'll share some of those with you.

Today I had a craving for corned beef hash - must be I felt a need for the grease! Decided to gratify that craving by having a smaller quantity. It was a pretty good lunch, actually. The whole thing was only 8.5 points out of my 24/day count. Not bad since I only had 18.5 left after breakfast. Here's the menu: 1/3 can (15 oz) hash - 7 pts, 1 egg - 1 pt, 1 whole wheat lite toast - .5 pt, using ~1 teaspoon I Can't Believe it's not Butter which is only 1 pt/tablespoon, so it's fairly insignificant.

That leaves me with 10 points for the rest of today, enough for chicken tenders with a nice big salad, a hot vegetable & maybe even a waffle with Smucker's sugarless orange marmalade!!! Mmmmmm!

Daily Hint: If I really crave a high point item, it's better to have a small amount than to end up depriving myself & hating the new eating habits!

It's Monday Madness and more...

2007-05-21T09:37:00.001-05:00

This week's questions; all about birthdays!
Happy Birthday Natalie!!! (Natalie/Otto's birthday is tomorrow.)
1. Name one thing you received as a gift on your last birthday. Love! It may be a phone call, a visit, a card, or some other token of acknowledgment... but bottom line, the message is 'I'm glad you were born.'

2. What would be the "perfect" birthday gift? Okay, call me sappy but my answer is in number one.

3. Do you look forward to birthdays? Not really, but I am more aware of my age on my birthday. I guess my attitude still is '...better than the alternative.'

4. On your birthday, do you treat yourself to something special each year? Not really but then again, I've never been overly excited one way or the other about my birthday.

5. Do you bother keeping up with your horoscope on a regular basis? Yes... it usually has some relationship to my life - except when it refers to my 'love life' - which is nonexistent. I'm a widow with no intention or desire to resume a brand new love life. I find mine, not on MyYahoo, but the regular Yahoo page which can now be customized & is faster loading the MyYahoo! Matter of fact, here's my horoscope for today:

Quickie: Improving your health is admirable -- lecturing other people to do the same is not.
Overview: Branch out. Take a language class. Try some exotic delicacies. Attend art galleries, poetry readings and cultural festivals. If you make an effort to enjoy and indulge in the new and the sublime, it will indulge you.

6. What zodiac sign are you, and do you think you fit the description for that sign? I'm a Pisces & pretty much fit the sign. I also read an inspirational quote of the day - arriving every weekday in my email. I always think it's a good way to find something to blog about... and today's was NO exception:
... that today is the birthday of the Automobile Speed Limit? In 1901,
Connecticut enacted the first automobile speed limit:15 mph on country
highways and 12 mph within city limits.Celebrate by keeping to the speed
limit on our roadways.
~~~
Today's Inspirational Quote:
"The moment of enlightenment is when a person's dreams ofpossibilities become images of probabilities."
--
Vic Braden, American Tennis Coach

The auto speed thing? Appropriate! Not gonna tell the whole story here but... Friday late afternoon I was stopped by a policeman for speeding. I was going fast - didn't know how fast! It's a new car and moves 'easier' than my old pickup truck did. I was going 72 in a 45 mile/hour zone... and honestly didn't realize it. The WONDERFUL officer actually let me off with a warning! You know, I actually like and respect police officers and that must show through. I was not frightened (although my passenger was a bit nervous) and I guess that's a good thing too.

Happy Birthday Sharba!!!

2007-05-16T08:26:00.001-05:00

Golly it's hard to believe... only fifty years ago today I finally gave birth to you! In my young mind you were coming late. Your big sister, Windy, was born eleven months prior to your birthday and she was two weeks early! I was hoping for the same with you... and here you were... finally..... a whole day later than Dr. Stander predicted you would arrive!

I had a great Mother's Day...

2007-05-14T09:19:00.001-05:00

Heard from some and enjoyed visits with others... all in all none of my beautiful six daughters missed it! I will be visiting my mom today (she didn't want me to stop by on Sunday). Don't ask - she's 91 and deserves to do it any way she wants to!

Now here's my Monday Madness. Natalie (OttO), you outdid yourself this time. The questions concern something I'm a bit opinionated about, so here are my answers:

1. Which web browser do you prefer? I use MSIE7, MSIE6 and Firefox. I prefer MS internet explorer 6 best because i'm most comfortable with it. Microsoft made it too safe in MSIE7 - so safe that it's too time-consuming to use. Using Firefox sometimes to get used to it... because Microsoft, unfortunately just becomes bulkier and bulkier and i'm losing tolerance for all of the new products!

2. Are you a PC user or MAC user? PC but might have to go over to the more expensive MAC in future. Don't like all that overhead built into Microsoft products. If I decide to stay with PC - am trying to learn more about Linux - especially the newest version - Ubuntu (http://www.ubuntu.com/).

3. Will your next computer purchase happen within the next year (do you think)? I hope not!!! I like the ones I have - except maybe... just maybe..... a bigger notebook some day.

4. Will you purchase your next computer at a local store or via the internet? Whereever i can find the best deal.

5. Have you had any experience with Windows Vista? Not personally but as recently past president of a computer club i had a fullblown legal Vista OS when it first came out. Couldn't even give it away to any of our members. Have since given it to a nephew who might try it when he builds himself a new computer.

6. What are your feelings about this new operating system (if any)? All based on reviews by friends in a computer club...

It's too bulky and not compatible for use on existing older computers already set up with XP (or older) OS.
There's a bit of a learning curve involved for those of us that are comfortable with all previous Microsoft operating systems so one friend who evaluated Vista & uses it in his workplace suggests unless you are going to have to use it in the office, keep your old Windows versions. You can still purchase new computers from sources - one is Dell - with XP OS and soon to come, with Linux OS.
Another friend bought a laptop with Vista just to learn and evaluate it. He says Vista does not work well with older versions of MS programs.
Yet another friend, who works with multiple computers in a school, likes Vista just fine... but he still has the old OS on his system at home.
Linux is not as fancy... it's open source (free)... and updated every six months.
Linux works with your old Windows programs (I think) - but if you're starting fresh you can also get just about any program you want online - open source. So far all I hear is good & will be trying it on one of my computers soon!

What was the question again?

Now I know...

2007-05-12T13:49:00.001-05:00

...the best reason to TIVO Letterman! Today I played two nights of David Letterman Latenight while folding laundry and other mundane tasks around the house - without zapping through the commercials. I would guesstimate that at least a half hour of each hour is commercials. If I tried watching it real time I'd probably fall asleep during the first set of commercials.

Hey kids! Go visit Foggybloggy - and don't forget to leave a message. She blogs more regularly than any of us. Go, Patti!!!

It's Cinco de Mayo...

2007-05-05T13:21:00.001-05:00

Have a good one! Today a friend told me it doesn't matter so much who reads her blog... it's therapeutic. Know what? That's the way I used to be... and now it's not so much fun. Why? I think I started writing to get other bloggers to come and leave comments.

No more! It's back to basics for this lady. Some days may be different than the old days BFD (Before Frank Died) - but they are days nonetheless - they are my days - and by golly, I'm gonna make the best of it.

I went to a meeting Thursday. We call them 'dioxin meetings'. The chemical company and the state government regulatory people are working together to clean up a chemical they couldn't even find in such tiny amounts a century ago when it all started. I don't attend those meetings to make sure they're doing it right. They know what they are doing. I attend because I find it therapeutic! I attend because there's a gang of bullies who want to get something for nothing from the giant company. I attend because those bullies want to drag me and my neighbors along with them by claiming they represent all of us. I attend to represent me and the majority of my neighbors!

Now I'd better go over to TRVoice & blog about that meeting. If you happen to stop by there, don't think ill of me - I plan on using that last paragraph to get the thing going. I think my writer's block just got unblocked!